Ideas and guides

30 questions to ask your grandparents

Questions by theme – childhood, love, work, hard times, legacy – so that family stories are never lost.

Many of us only realise how much we never asked when it is too late. A good question opens a door: behind a simple “what was it like…?” whole life stories appear. You don’t need to ask them all at once – 3 to 5 questions per conversation is plenty.

Childhood

1. Where were you born, and what was the house you grew up in like?
2. What is your earliest memory?
3. What smells do you remember from home?
4. What games did you play as a child, and with whom?
5. What was an ordinary Sunday like in your family?

Parents and grandparents

1. What kind of person was your mother? And your father?
2. What did you learn from them that still stays with you?
3. Do you remember your own grandparents? What did the family say about them?
4. Was there a legendary family story that was told again and again?
5. Which of your mother’s dishes have you never forgotten?

School and youth

1. What school did you go to, and who was your favourite teacher?
2. Who were your best friends when you were young?
3. Where did you go out for fun?
4. What was your dream at sixteen?
5. Which song takes you straight back to your youth?

Love and family

1. How did you meet your partner? What was your first impression?
2. What was your wedding like?
3. What do you remember about the birth of your children?
4. What was the hardest and the most beautiful part of being a parent?
5. What do you think makes love last a lifetime?

Work and hard times

1. What was your first job, and what did it pay?
2. What are you proudest of in your life?
3. What was the hardest time of your life, and what helped you through?
4. Was there a decision that changed everything?
5. What would you do differently today?

Legacy

1. What would you like to tell your grandchildren?
2. What is the most important thing life has taught you?
3. Which family tradition would you like us to carry on?
4. What brings you the most joy today?
5. How would you like to be remembered?

Tips for the conversation

• Ask open questions and leave room for silence – remembering takes time.
• Ask about details: names, smells, tastes, something that was said.
• If a memory moves them, don’t rush on. Ask whether they would like to continue.
• Record it – with notes, an audio recording, or let Memoair turn the conversation into a book.